I wonder if Mary was over-due when she made that journey on the donkey. I 'spose not, because they probably didn't have "due dates" then. She probably just had a vague idea of when the baby would be born. See, that's the problem with the way we "do it" these days. As much as you try not to "pin your hopes" on a specific date, you just can't help it. Everything revolves around it. Fundal heights, your weight, baby dropping, the frequency of your midwife visits, the amount of phone calls from interested people...it all revolves around your date.
Sigh.
And I promised myself that this pregnancy, I would be good. I wasn't going to even thiiiiink about my date.
Impossible.
So here I sit. With my hopes pinned on a date that happened a few days ago. A day that passed by with merely a twinge. Obviously baby didn't want to be born on that day. So now I get to be lumped into the "over-due" group, and watched with suspecious eyes every time I say "I don't feel so good." My life has been reduced to a mere waiting game. I can't plan ahead because who knows what I'll be doing on that date, and yet, I have to plan ahead to give myself some purpose to my days!
If I could magically make this baby come....I would. If I could visualise it enough to make it happen....I would. If I could eat more curries, pineapple, and fish'n'chups...I would. But it aint gonna work. I learned that with Christian's pregnancy (my almost 3 week over-due bubby). Baby will come in his own grand time. My role is to relax and take it easy, and trust in the Lord's plan for our lives. Much much much easier said than done.
That being said...I'm happy. I have my friend here, helping out. My word, she's such a blessing! She has her own little baby, but she's been basically single-handedly running this house. Baking bread for us every day, making dinners, doing washing, being oh so patient with the kiddies and loving them, encouraging me and cheering me up when I'm flat, laughing with me over the most ridiculous things... yes, she's wonderful. I woke up the other morning and found my kiddies already eating their brekky. You have to be me to know how awesome that was! I didn't have to do it. Infact, I hardly had to think at all that morning. I got to just exisit. Bliss!! I'm so grateful she's taken this time to come and help...being away from her hubby isn't easy, and I'm pretty sure I'll always be in her debt for this sacrifice. ;-)
My husband's awesome too. I don't talk about him much on this blog, mainly because if I did, you'd all be green with envy and someone might try to poison me and steal him away... but I'm going to just brag on him for a bit because, well, he really is awesome.
He's my rock when I'm all hormonal and weepy and irrational. Every night he lies in bed and just listens to me talk. For hours. I chatter on and on about the silliest things, and he never makes fun of me, and listens intently to what I'm saying, even if it's completely ridiculous, and then he'll only offer advice if I ask for it. He scratches my back and rubs my aching muscles (and feet!) whenever I ask. I'm so spoiled by him!! The other night was I dealing with what I thought might be the beginning of labour starting. I was starting to tense up a little, and wonder if I could really do it (not that I have much choice in the matter, but still... it was a mental process I had to sort through!), and he looked deep into my eyes and told me that I could. That I am a strong woman, and I could do this. And I would do it well. I just felt so loved and cherished, and ready to face whatever the night threw at me.... which happened to be a good nights sleep, much to my disappointment. Hehe. But I feel so blessed that I'm not going into this transformation process (as that is what labour is...) on my own. No. We are facing it as a team, and will ride it out together.
I love my husband. God was so good when He gave him to me!!
Anyway! That gem of a man is downstairs at the moment with all four children, entertaining them while I flob on the couch. So hi ho hi ho, I'm going to go join them. Family time is just way too precious these days!
xoxox
No comments:
Post a Comment